Hi Ya’ll, I’m Beth Moore and I love Sandtray Therapy!! It all started for me when I did my first sandtray in graduate school for counseling. Viola, I had immediate insight into my reality by looking at my little miniatures in my world. My heart was changed and I knew this is what I wanted to specialize in as a counselor. Read more about 9 ways to develop self care….
In this Article:
- My First Sandtray
- 9 Ways to Develop Self Care
- Sandtray Summit 2019 in Atlanta, GA
- AST (Association for Sandtray Therapy)
- RIST (Registered Integrative Sandtray Therapist)
My First Sandtray
So, let me take you back to what it felt like to do my first sandtray.
I’m sitting there thinking well this will be fun, we all got to choose miniatures that represent our family members. How cute are these little miniatures in my hand.
Then it’s my turn to go first, so no problem. I explain each of the miniatures as I place them on the floor in front of me, forming them in a nice & cute little circle. Ah, my family close in a circle, how lovely…
Where are you?
Until my peer and friend looks at me sweetly and calmly and asks…
“Where are you?”
I look at her perplexed… what do mean where am I?? I am, of course, right there….
Where am I?
I glance down at the floor in front of me.
Tears form so fast in my eyes and fall down on my knees.
I cannot deny it.
I am not there.
How did this happen?
I forgot about me.
I’m not even in the circle with my family.
There is no miniature to represent me, because I forgot about myself.
There was no denying it because it was true.
I had forgotten myself.
Has that ever happened to you?
Have you ever forgot about yourself?
Sometimes, you may work so hard for everybody else in your life, that you’re exhausted?
You take care of your children, your spouse/partner, your parents, your family, your friends.
But what about you?
What happens to all the people around you, if you are not even there?
I mean really, if you’re not able to be there at all, say you’re gone.
How could you help them then?
You can’t.
So, how important is self care?
Self care is more important than caregiving.
That may sound contradictory.
How could self care be more important than caring for others? I mean, think of a mom’s self care being more important than her children. Sounds backwards?
9 Ways to Develop Self Care
How do you develop self care?
Self care is really self-authoring, being real, being attuned to your self, finding your whole self again.
Beth Moore, PLPC 2019
www.moorewellness.life
In my experiences, there are 9 ways to develop self care as a priority in my life.
Why not try it? Read about 9 ways to develop self care.
#1: Self Care is Self-Authoring
Self care is really self-authoring, where you tell your story about your life from your perspective. You get to write your story. You get to decide how your story unfolds, what’s written in the next chapter.
The more you care for yourself,
the more you can write your own story.
#2: Self care is being real.
How can you take real care of yourself if you’re not being real?
If you are being fake, you cannot truly take care of your basic needs and desires.
Self care requires being real about what you really need, what you really want, and what you really desire.
Self care is being real about your:
- needs
- wants
- desires
#3: Self care if being attuned to your self.
If you are trying to please others, how will you truly take care of yourself and even know what you need?
You have to be attuned to your self,
to take care of all your needs.
Especially your basic needs, the longer you ignore those body signals, the more physically sick you’ll become.
#4: Self care is finding your whole self again.
This way can take awhile, especially if you are a trauma survivor.
Trauma survivors work so hard at surviving, that they have to forget about their body’s signals to slow down and rest.
Self care is taking the time
to listen to your body, mind, and spirit
to see what each part of you needs.
#5: Self care is being present.
The first step of self care is identifying where you are, so you can find yourself again.
Sometimes, I’m going so fast I can barely slow down, and it feels like I’m going ninety different directions.
So, just taking the time to realize where you are can be helpful.
Am I present in the here and now?
Once I realized I was missing from my priority, I could put myself back into the circle again.
#6: Self care is choosing you.
The second step of self care is choosing you.
Oh, the relief when I can finally go get my own miniature and include my miniature of myself into the family circle, oh how good it feels.
#7: Prioritize self care and loving self.
Consider how to prioritize your self care. How important is self care?
It may be really important, but just hard to make time to actually do it.
What happens if you forget self care?
Forgetting Self Care
The difference between seeing myself forgotten and remembered will stay with me for a lifetime.
I”ll never forget how it felt to put myself back into my family circle, literally and symbolically.
You see, I had felt so guilty prioritizing myself as I went to graduate school, that I felt guilty not spending as much time with my family.
So, I couldn’t see how I would prioritize my self and my self care!!
#8: Model Self Care for Your Children
Then I realized, I was modeling self care for my children.
My children would follow my example and take care of themselves the same way I took care of myself.
So, really choosing self care is better for your children.
Now, I’m not saying to neglect your children, there’s a balance of taking care of yourself and taking care of your children. The key is finding the balance to continue your self care while taking care of your children.
Choice of Neglect or Self Care
So, I had a choice:
- Continue on the path to neglecting myself, and teach my children to neglect themselves
- Change my path and prioritize my self care and remember my self, teaching my children to take care of themselves and remember their care as a priority.
Choosing Self Care
I continually choose to dive into self care every day, creating a habit, creating a lifestyle of self care.
I see my children taking care of themselves better, too.
Choose self care & feel guilt-free, you’re choosing to care for yourself so you can take better care of your children.
My level of self care reflects how well I’m doing, and vice versa.
#9: Choose self care daily.
The journey of prioritizing self care is a continuous journey every day.
This is a continuous journey for me, prioritizing self care and choosing it daily. I had to choose every day during graduate school, and every day since then.
I have a few close friends that will gently ask me how my self care is doing. Especially the more stressed I am, or the busier my life is getting.
The busier I get, the more self care I need.
The more I choose self care each day:
- I can handle problems better
- The calmer I am inside
- I find joy easier throughout the day
How many ways do you develop self care?
How do you continuously choose self care this week?
Am I remembering to take care of myself today?
How can I take care of myself in this moment?
You can only drink from a full cup.
I LOVE this quote!!
Seriously, I’ve tried to drink from an empty cup, and there just isn’t anything there.
So, it’s vital to take time and priority to fill your cup up, regain your energy, restore with life-giving sources.
Sandtray Summit 2019 in Atlanta
So, this is where it all comes full circle (again in my life).
I’m sitting at the Sandtray Summit in Atlanta, Georgia (U.S.A.). And the theme on one of the cards on my table reads, “You can only drink from a full cup.”
Oh, do I know this lesson, so true and I so needed to hear this during the busy seasons of life.
So, I take my miniature cup and water and put it in my sandtray, representing putting priority on my self care, my needs, my dreams.
I am choosing myself,
I am taking care of me,
I am following my dreams.
AST (Association for Sandtray Therapy)
Part of my dream is practicing as a counselor using Sandtray Therapy. It’s so life-gving and transforming for me.
My dream includes getting to now serve on the Association for Sandtray Therapy (AST) that was recently formed in April 2019!!
People have asked me if they can join AST, and the answer is …
Right now, mental health professionals can join AST.
Soon, others who love sandtray as a sensory tool, coping tool, and reflection tool will also be able to join AST. Some of these people may be teachers, parents with children who have autism, spiritual directors, pastors, college professors, preschool teachers, youth directors, program directors at assisted living facilities, and more.
Here’s the link for more information, and remember, the association for formed April 2019, it’s being formed by its members!!
www.a4st.org
I am honored to be on the AST (Association for Sandtray Therapy) Board of Officers and I’m so excited to grow alongside my fellow Sandtray Therapists.
RIST (Registered Integrative Sandtray Therapist)
This season of life is amazing for me. There are so many circles being formed and completed and connecting.
I’m diving in as a RIST (Registered Integrative Sandtray Therapist) and finishing up my provisional license hours for LPC (Licensed Professional Counselor).
I love using Sandtray Therapy and Play Therapy with clients in Louisiana, teaching about integrative therapies, and finding new ways to heal our whole mind-body-spirit.
I use Sandtray Therapy to help me and my clients visually see how much self care is happening, or maybe the lack of self care that’s missing in life.
How do you choose self care?
In what ways do you choose yourself?
Maybe your self care looks different than mine, that’s totally okay.
Self care looks different for each person, as unique and as personalized as you are your own person.
May your self care journey be enriching, enlightening, and enjoyable.
Beth Moore, PLPC 2019
www.moorewellness.life
SUMMARY OF THIS ARTICLE:
- First Sandtray
- 9 Ways to Develop Self Care
- Sandtray Summit 2019 in Atlanta, GA
- AST (Association for Sandtray Therapy)
- RIST (Registered Integrative Sandtray Therapist)
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Beth
Need help finding a counselor?
If you need someone to help to talk to, counselors and mental health professionals can help provide support resources on:
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- stress management
- procrastination
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